So I'm sitting in a two-seater on the train on my way into work. I take this train ever morning at 8:12am and its usually quite empty for a few stops until we get into the thick of the city.
Tell me why this tiny little thing decides to take my left hip out while trying to sit on the seat next to me? Chick, you just sat on top of me like you were MY size and she scared the living shit out of me because I was asleep! I wondered if she even took a good look at my thickness and thought that maybe, just maybe, this would NOT end well for her. She waited for a reaction from me but at 8:12 in the morning I decided I would put it in a bubble and let it go. Mind you, being a New Yorker now I am liable to go ballistic on anyone at anytime so I would really like to see someone try and push me around during rush hour...If there was any test of a humans ability to be calm during fight or flight mode then being on a NY subway is certainly one way to go.
Homechick had perfectly manicured nails that matched her Banana Republic ensemble. Her hair was cinnamon colored and she smelled very fresh, like a combo of organza's and chocolate. It was a such a shame she invited me to go head to head with her on this particular morning...Crazy chick...
42 street...my stop..her stop...Just like she finagled her way and man-handled my left hip I elbowed her on my way up from out of my seat. She was too shocked to get up and it took her a second or two to realize what just happened. Ok so maybe I'm taking the express bus to hell for being so angry but dude....I mean, really...dude...
I'm sorry that your life sucks right now, little pretty chick...But next time, think twice about being so aggressive at 8:12 am on the 1 train....Good morning, this is New York.
No comments:
Post a Comment